Success with the Taxman

After five years of unreturned tax returns and unpaid late penalty fees, the taxman issued a demand, giving my STRAWMAN a month to bring the account up to date or face legal proceedings. This is what they received in response.

Ariel Sharron
The Monarch’s Revenue Collectors (TMRC)
Windsor House
Temple Town W6 66M

16 February 2010

NOTICE OF CONDITIONAL ACCEPTANCE

NOTICE TO AGENTS IS NOTICE TO PRINCIPAL
NOTICE TO PRINCIPAL IS NOTICE TO AGENT

Dear Ariel Sharron,

Re: X ##########

Following receipt of your letter dated 08 February 2010, pertaining to the alleged requirement for STRAWMAN™ to send overdue tax returns and payments; I hereby serve notice that I conditionally agree to settle The Monarch’s Revenue Collectors (TMRC)’S claim, for and on behalf of STRAWMAN™, in the most expedient manner possible, upon receipt of the following:

1. Material evidence demonstrating that STRAWMAN™ created, incurred, agreed or consented to the alleged liability.
2. Material evidence demonstrating that STRAWMAN™ has received benefits from public services as a direct result of moneys paid in taxes to The Monarch’s Revenue Collectors (TMRC).
3. Material evidence demonstrating that The Monarch’s Revenue Collectors (TMRC) has the legal right to estimate the taxable income of STRAWMAN™ for the tax years 2005-2009.
4. Material evidence that STRAWMAN™ agreed or consented to the estimation by The Monarch’s Revenue Collectors (TMRC) of the alleged taxable income.
5. Material evidence demonstrating that the property of STRAWMAN™ is not private in nature and exempt from levy and third party lien of all manner and description.
6. Material evidence that not one penny of the taxes previously paid to The Monarch’s Revenue Collectors (TMRC) has not been spent on the murder of innocent men, women and children in the unlawful occupations of Afghanistan and Iraq.

I look forward to receiving the above listed items within fourteen (14) days of your receipt of this notice. Failure to deliver an appropriate response will result in the lawful presumption that the alleged liability cannot be verified or validated and the matter will be considered settled and closed, with no further action required by either party.

Without malice, mischief, ill will, frivolity or vexation; in sincerity and honour,

By: Freeman-on-the-Land, Upper-Case: Lower©
Authorised Representative for STRAWMAN™ (& all derivatives thereof)
All Rights Reserved – Without Prejudice – Without Recourse – Non-Assumpsit
Errors & Omissions Excepted

After refusing to respond appropriately by passing the account to an unauthorised representative, I served the taxman an opportunity to cure their dishonour.

PRIVATE & CONFIDENTIAL
Ariel Sharron
The Monarch’s Revenue Collectors (TMRC)
Windsor House
Temple Town W6 66M

09 March 2010
NOTICE OF OPPORTUNITY TO CURE DISHONOUR

NOTICE TO AGENTS IS NOTICE TO PRINCIPAL
NOTICE TO PRINCIPAL IS NOTICE TO AGENTS
Dear Ariel Sharron,

Re: X ##########

Following receipt of Mr R Hatchet’s unauthorised letter dated 19 February 2010, the contents of which are refused for cause without dishonour on the basis that they are both inappropriate and factually incorrect; I hereby serve NOTICE OF OPPORTUNITY TO CURE DISHONOUR. Once again, I conditionally agree to settle The Monarch’s Revenue Collectors (TMRC)’ claim, for and on behalf of STRAWMAN™, in the most expedient manner possible, upon receipt of the following items:

1. Material evidence demonstrating that Mr R Hatchet’s letter does not comprise clear breaches of Your Charter for and on behalf of TMRC.
2. Material evidence demonstrating that TMRC is not obliged to provide material evidence that its claims are valid upon reasonable request by individuals upon whom those claims are made.
3. Material evidence demonstrating that STRAWMAN™ created, incurred, agreed or consented to the alleged tax responsibilities and/or liabilities.
4. Material evidence demonstrating that STRAWMAN™ has received benefits from public services as a direct result of moneys paid in taxes to The Monarch’s Revenue Collectors (TMRC).
5. Material evidence demonstrating that STRAWMAN™ is a “self employed person”.
6. Material evidence demonstrating that STRAWMAN™ has a legal obligation to submit the “outstanding tax returns” or pay late filing penalties.
7. Material evidence demonstrating that the property of STRAWMAN™ is not private in nature and exempt from levy and third party lien of all manner and description.
8. Material evidence that not one penny of the taxes previously paid to The Monarch’s Revenue Collectors (TMRC) has not been spent on the murder of innocent men, women and children in the unlawful occupations of Afghanistan and Iraq.

I look forward to receiving the above listed items within seven (7) days of your receipt of this notice. Failure to deliver an appropriate response will result in the lawful presumption that the alleged liability cannot be verified or validated and the matter will be considered settled and closed, with no further action required by either party.

Without malice, mischief, ill will, frivolity or vexation; in sincerity and honour,

By: Freeman-on-the-Land, Upper-Case: Lower©
Authorised Representative for STRAWMAN™ (& all derivatives thereof)
All Rights Reserved – Without Prejudice – Without Recourse – Non-Assumpsit
Errors & Omissions Excepted

Following my opportunity to cure, I received another final demand, this time from the debt manager, who gave me zero days to bring the account up to date or face immediate legal action. Within 24 hours he received my response.

PRIVATE & CONFIDENTIAL
LUCIFER TAXING
Debt Manager
The Monarch’s Revenue Collectors (TMRC)
Windsor House
Temple Town W6 66M

01 April 2010

DECLARATION OF NO EMPLOYMENT AND CANCELLATION OF REGISTRATION

NOTICE TO AGENTS IS NOTICE TO PRINCIPAL
NOTICE TO PRINCIPAL IS NOTICE TO AGENTS

Dear LUCIFER TAXING,

Re: X ##########

Following yesterday’s receipt of your letter dated 29 March 2010, the entire contents of which are refused for cause without dishonour, on the basis that STRAWMAN is not a “Self Employed person”, thereby vitiating all of the claims made by TMRC in relation to this matter, nunc-pro-tunc; I hereby serve DECLARATION OF NO EMPLOYMENT AND CANCELLATION OF REGISTRATION.

Without limitation, in good faith and for the avoidance of doubt; to the very best of my knowledge, STRAWMAN has no taxable income to declare or self-assessment returns to file or late filing penalties to pay in relation to the above referenced account, for the following reasons:

1. STRAWMAN is neither an Unemployed person, an Employed person or a Self Employed person, in that STRAWMAN is not
a) Employed by any individual or organisation to perform tasks in return for remuneration
b) Running a for profit business with a financial turnover
c) Claiming state benefits
and therefore, cannot be deemed a “taxpayer” and/or liable for the charges.
2. Any and all property belonging to or in the possession of STRAWMAN is private in nature, having been granted in trust for the benefit of third parties.
3. I hereby repudiate and rescind any and all agreements, consents and/or authorisations deemed to have been granted by STRAWMAN to TMRC, whether express or implied, by signature or otherwise, since the registration of my birth.
4. TMRC’s registration of STRAWMAN as a “Self Employed person” is therefore canceled nunc-pro-tunc.

Furthermore, your letter of 29 March 2010 failed to provide reasonably requested material evidence demonstrating that:

a. Mr R Hatchet’s letter of 19 February 2010 does not comprise clear breaches of Your Charter for and on behalf of TMRC. [Indeed, it is my contention that your letter of 29 March 2010 may also constitute evidence of further breaches of Your Charter.]
b. TMRC is not obliged to provide material evidence that its claims are valid upon reasonable request by individuals upon whom those claims are made. [With all due respect, arguing that TMRC, a legal entity with a chief executive, is not obliged to validate its claims is a moot point, since it clearly implies that TMRC is not subject to English, European and International laws, which is evidently not the case.]
c. STRAWMAN has received benefits from public services as a direct result of moneys paid in taxes to TMRC. [One of several issues which TMRC has repeatedly failed to address.]
d. STRAWMAN has a legal obligation to submit the “outstanding tax returns”. [The failure to provide statutory evidence of this alleged obligation gives rise to the lawful presumption that it cannot be provided upon reasonable request.]
e. Not one penny of the taxes previously paid to TMRC has been spent on the murder of innocent men, women and children in the unlawful occupations of Afghanistan and Iraq. [To knowingly contribute financially to the execution of these illegal wars would be a breach of international law. Even if this was not the case, in the Court of Conscience, I unequivocally declare that I will never, under any circumstances whatsoever, authorise such a contribution.]

Wherefore, STRAWMAN cannot be deemed a “taxpayer” by TMRC for the period in question and the penalties (with or without interest) cannot be enforced, at law or in equity, since there is no justifiable cause for TMRC to raise a “Revenue Determination” in order to estimate a liability which cannot be proven to exist, whether under statute or otherwise.

Kindly cease and desist from making unsubstantiated claims against STRAWMAN and update your records accordingly. Please also be advised that TMRC does not have my authorisation or consent to issue valuable securities in the name STRAWMAN.

Without malice, mischief, ill will, frivolity or vexation; in sincerity and honour,

By: Freeman-on-the-Land, Upper-Case: Lower©
Authorised Representative for STRAWMAN™ (& all derivatives thereof)
All Rights Reserved – Without Prejudice – Without Recourse – Non-Assumpsit
Errors & Omissions Excepted

After hearing nothing for three weeks, I received a tax return for next year, which I happily refused for cause and sent back without a covering notice. About two weeks later, I took delivery of two letters from yet another department of the monarch’s revenue collectors. The first missive informed me that my STRAWMAN would no longer be receiving tax returns, since he was no longer deemed a ‘taxpayer’. The second was a money order refunding a little under two hundred pounds – a credit to the account I had no idea I was owed, which may well be an unprecedented success in this regard.

[bitmate-author-donate]